A letter to the Stock Room Idiot

I know you know what Brassica butterflies are because you were the first person to tell me of their existence when I was trying to get you to answer a simple question about monarchs. Then I thought it was a communication problem, but as of today I have decided it is because you have a degree in ineptitude. No one is that skillfull without extensive training.

Today when I asked you where the woman who knows what she is doing is, you asked me what I needed, so I made the mistake of telling you:
"Brassica butterflies."
"Brassica?"
"Yes. Six units of their eggs, to be exact."
"Brassica is a plant."
"Yes, you're right. And Brassica butterflies feed off Brassica plants. Hence the name."
"You don't want to order six units of Brassica seeds if you're trying to get butterflies."
"You are absolutely right. Please tell me where [competent person] is."

There is no excuse for that conversation.

::EDIT FROM LAB::
Chi-squared tests can kiss my ass. SPSS can kiss my ass. Ecology can kiss my ass. College can kiss my ass. I quit. So kiss my ass.

Devil's Haircut

Well, I redid my hair last night. A twist on your standard purple-and-red. It was supposed to be purple blue wine red. Unfortunately, the purple dye overpowered everything else except the red. So tomorrow I will be touching it up: adding blue in over the purple on my bangs to make it darker, putting burgandy over the red, just to see what happens.

I'll post pictures when I'm satisfied.

Happy Halloween from Comic House.

teeter totter

Well, the weekend was interesting. Family was in a good mood, but things were still awkward. For example, while we were at the Melting Pot:

Fam: "So, what Williams genetic traits do we share?"
*Cue the entire table of eight people falling silent.*
Me: "Um...I'm not sure what you're asking..."
Fam: "What genes do we have in common?"
Me: "Technically..."
Fam: "I know, but some of it is upbringing."
Me: "...You're pig-headed." *takes large sip from vodka cocktail waiter was kind enough not to card me for*
Table: "...." *stuffs mouths with food.*

And then, this morning I got to wake up at 8 AM to listen to her bitch about how her sister-in-law was raising her children. This time I kept my mouth shut.

Other than that, though, it was surprisingly fun overall.

But, for some reason haven't been able to be in a good mood today. Was made worse by the phone call I just finished with. I hate it when he gets tired and pissy and then decides to go to bed and leave me to fume because it took him until midnight my time to tell me when he could call and then got cranky because it wasn't the best time for me. - -;

So now I am even LESS motivated to get anything done.

*sighs* This day has felt so weird.

Boat Day!

Matt, Sarah, Daryl, and I went on the boat this weekend while Fam and Unc were out here. Here are some pics.


This is the boat. It's an antique wooden yacht from the 30s. We're in the process of restoring it. On the inside there is a top sitting area, a lower bunk area, a kitchen, a dining room, and a bathroom. This pic is taken from the restaurant we boated to and docked at. It was kinda fun getting it all tied down while the people on the deck watched. >>; I felt official, especially in my SCARF OF DOOM.


Matt has an ear infection, so we made sure he was nicely bundled up. >.<;;
It was kind of windy outside, and Sarah was using me as a pillow.


It took Daryl far too long to acheive this pose because he couldn't get his fingers to work right.

Holomovement

Currently experimenting with cooking tofu. Never done it before. Threw tofu in with my udon last night along with a little egg and loved it to death. Now I'm trying fried tofu. You wok-fry it, drain it, and then soak it in boiling water to remove all the oil so it stays light and fluffy. Imma try it with some soy.

Batgirl used to eat tofu raw. I still can't do that because the texture bothers me. But she liked it a lot.

I wonder how she's doing. I seem to have lost track of so many people.

The family is coming up this weekend. I really am dreading it. I'd like for it to be pleasant, and I'm hoping it will be, but...this is the woman who spent my 18th birthday dinner talking about how she was raising her daughter. This is the woman who last year asked "since when do you get what you want for your birthday?" This is the man who acts like a two-year old and likes to give me little or no credit.

I just don't know what I'd do if they're actually trying to change.

I have no idea what is up with the commenting system. Working on it.

::edit:: what the heeell? Why does this post have comments but the one before it doesn't?

::2nd edit:: there, I fixed it.

Stupid body. Always getting in the way.

It's gone insane. It wants veggies and fruit and tofu, yes it does precious. None of that nasty meat or cheese those scary hobbitses eats, no. We wants to eats it raw and crunchy, yes. (Or, in the case of tofu, soggy.)

*sighs* Either that or I've been possessed by a Buddhist monk.

Had the best salad ever tonight. It was a scary experience.

Tomorrow I'm going to the grocery store and buying udon and tofu and having soup.

Aren't I supposed to be in control of YOU, damnit?

Wren wants.

A picture is worth 1k orgasms.

A pic and some notes

For those of you who want to know, here is Maddo's hair:


I cut it and dyed it for her. The color is Fishbowl (which really brings out her eyes), and the cut is an asymetrical slant. The right side is shorter than the left, which I think looks crazy cute. The back is short enough to not be overly punky, and it can be spiked, which I am looking foreward to seeing. Once I get my new blue color in I'm probably going to attack her and add in blue streaks and tones.

Also, I am changing the comment system, since Haloscan has barely been working and prunes my comments anyway. So do not be alarmed, and no, you don't need a blogger account to comment.

::EDIT::
TO change the comments I had to reset the template, but I don't feel like screwing around with the colors right now. So bear with me for a little bit.

mmm, hair

Was amused today while wig shopping online. The color name on the wig I was looking at in purple was "Izzy", and it was the EXACT PURPLE of my druid's hair.

Cut the back of my hair today to give it some shape again and lighten it up. Feels sooo much better! Also gave Maddo a pretty damn good cut. I'm going to beg her for pictures later. It looks good, especialy since I had no clippers and had to cut her back up manually, and was doing the actual cutting with basic, full-sized scissors.

Oh yeah.

In other news, I have officially begun the Jordan cosplay. I will be buying the clothes I found with family's money, since I desperately need clothing anyway. >>;

The Pre-Nap Summary

So this week I have rewritten a paper twice, written two essays, missed two classes due to the rewritten paper, spent days chasing down a woman so I could FINISH said paper, spent two hours in the lab doing statistics, made a hammock for the rat, helped prepare for our event this weekend, and barely slept at all.

But on to the important stuff. The rat has since been sitting in the hammock with his little nose peeking out. I need pictures, because he is the picture of utter contentment. And I can tell he loves it because he refuses to pee on it. Which is good, since it means I won't have to clean it as often. His food bowl is under it, so he eats out in the open now, but he still insists on burying it. It's funny when you go to check if he has food because he gets so ANGRY when you move the shavings around.

Second, I don't know if I ever blogged about how slutty the freshmen this year are, and I'm too tired to check so I can cross-reference it, so I'm going to tell you now.

The freshmen this year are slutty. I remember sitting in Calc at the beginning of the semester and this girl walks in with those distressed jeans with the ass ripped out. That's not what makes it actually slutty. Her pink underwear matched her nail polish, belt, and shoes perfectly. So it's not just that she was wearing tattered pants: she was using her underwear to ACCESSORIZE. =_=; She and her friend spent all hour talking about their hair and how trendy Ms. Pinkarse was, and I remember wondering a) Were my fellow freshmen like this? b) am I back in HIGH SCHOOL?

We had a discussion about it over lunch and we decided they were just suffering from freedom euphoria and would soon settle down and start showing up with unbrushed hair and sweats to their 8AM classes.

Well, we were wrong. They're still doing it. And evidently the Administration isn't as clueless as I thought, because something tells me they've taken notice, too. Sarah and I were talking on the way back from that horrible stats thingy a few days ago. See, all these pregnancy awareness fliers have been popping up around the campus. We were wondering if they had put them up last year, too, and we didn't think so. We discussed it at dinner and came to the conclusion that this was the first time we'd seen them.

Coincidence? Somehow, I doubt it. Evidently we're not the only ones who noticed the freshmen seem to be a little different from the usual UPS stock.

I was working on an essay about Zen Buddhism

Wolfie: So which teas are calming?
Wren: Tazo Zen, Moroccan mint, Lemon spice.
Wolfie: All green and herbals are calming?
Wren: no, some herbals are scary, and some greens are too strong. But all my calming teas are either green OR herbal.
Wolfie: Ah.
Wolfie: Someday I will remember all of this and pass down the knowledge to another disciple.
Wren: That makes me glad.
Wolfie: And after you've taught me all that you can, I will kill you and become the only tea master.
Wren: You know tea, but you do not understand it, and thus it will consume you and lead you astray.
Wolfie: But I will gain understanding, for I already learn the mixtures for pleasing fusions quickly.
Wren: That is not the focus of the Tea Way. You should not bend it to please you, you should be pleased by it.
Wolfie: And I am. There is a grand satisfaction in proper brewing, in knowing that what I have made is pleasing in scent and taste.
Wren: Tea is not meant to foster pride.
Wolfie: Then what is it for?
Wren: That is indeed the question, is it not?
Wolfie: *sighs and bows* And that is why you are the Master.
Wren: Stay with me and understand, my son.
Wolfie: Teach me, my lady.

Update

So I'm sure all of you figured out that was a fake proposal. If not, rest assured that it was, and my grade is safe.

Wanna know how we showed it to her? I asked her if we could talk about it briefly after class "since she didn't know what we were doing and we wanted to see if there was anything glaringly wrong with it."

So after class we go out in the hall and she starts to read it. Sarah and I try very hard not to laugh or make eye contact.

After the first paragraph she lets out a sharp laugh, but stops when she realizes we still look serious.

However, before the end of the paper Sarah and I have exploded, so she and we are laughing hysterically.

Her comments?
"I was worried you were being serious! I was trying to figure out what to tell you..."
"Can I put this on my door?"
"Can I take your names off and mail it to a professor and ask them 'what do I DO?'"

So Sarah and I, feeling pretty smug, go on about our merry ways.

Then when we get home I check my e-mail, and we have a letter from her:
"Hello,

I just wanted to compliment you on your proposal writing again... it has
made me smile all day long.

Have a great weekend!"

So yeaaah, we're still feeling pretty smug.

Because I know you're curious: my independent proposal

Altering Prey Behavior to Affect Predation Rates

Ever since listening to Professor Burnaford’s lectures this semester, my partner Sarah and I have been very interested in predation. For our independent project, we decided to determine what effect prey mindset has on predation rates. We hypothesize that predators are less likely to consume prey that love them. We know that predators raised by a species that would normally be considered its prey are less likely to eat that particular species. For example, lions have been known to become insectivores due to psychological influence from meerkats and warthogs (Disney 1994). We are going to determine if this effect applies to the insect world.

To do this, we are going to take three sets of twenty fleas each and raise them from larvae to adulthood personally. Each tank will be treated in a different way. The control tank will be provided ample food, warmth, and humidity, and be left as is. The love-negative tank will be given the same ambient conditions as the control tank, but twice a day each larva will be taken out individually and given a speech about how worthless it is and how end up living on some broken-down Chihuahua and not a lush, long-haired Border Collie paradise. The love-positive tank will be treated in a very different manner. Twice a day each larva will be taken out individually and sung to, read to, and petted. These fleas will receive positive remarks about how high and far they can jump and how they will never have to settle for living on some inferior rodent’s skin. After the fleas have reached adulthood, they will be taken out as a tank. The number of bites received from each treatment will be recorded.

To perform this experiment we will need sixty young fleas, which can easily be obtained from the neighbor’s dog, where their populations seem to be FLOURISHING. We will also need three glass, well-sealed tanks, which Susan says we can obtain from the Biology Department. We may also need to rent sitcoms in case we run out of creative ways to compliment or insult our love-positive and love-negative fleas. We will also need a “flea diet” that consists mainly of dried blood for the juvenile fleas to develop. Finally, we will need some sort of way to control the humidity, since fleas thrive in warm, humid environments.

We plan to start gathering the flea larvae as soon as we have the tanks to put them in. The neighbor’s dog is readily accessible and will allow us to harvest his crop at the cost of a few dog biscuits. It should take two to three weeks for the larvae to develop. Larvae pupate for 7-14 days before reaching adulthood, so we will have some wait time before the experiment can be completed. Despite this, we are certain we can conclude the experiment by Thanksgiving.

SOURCES:
Disney, W. 1994. The Lion King. Walt Disney Pictures.
http://www.insectlore.com/xlorepedia_stuff/catflea.html

This week is insane.

Why?
1) Paper due Wednesday.
2) Test on Wednesday.
3) Paper due Friday which can't start until Wednesday.
4) Having trouble sleeping.

>.<;

It's lovely to feel too sick to do anything with your friends, so you end up feeling guilty and bored and lonely and there's nothing left to do but sleep.

That's the definition of being sick on a weekend.

Maybe my superpower is the ability to create essence of bitch and eyebeam it at people

So I dragged my increasingly sick ass off to the SUB to eat with my housemates tonight. I figured I could have applesauce and tea, but they had neither because the SUB on a Friday night is a BARREN WASTELAND DEVOID OF ALL SELECTION.

My stomach said "don't even think about it" to everything else I looked at, so I ambled about in a daze, sort of following Sarah. She heads over to the pasta line to get marinara for her cheese sticks when some hulking tall guy walks up behind her and starts inspecting her plate. Since he's wearing a pink-and-white-striped polo shirt and has pseudo surfer-smoker hair, I assume he's not someone she knows. I wander a little closer in case intervention is needed.

"That's a lot of fried food." *he points to her four cheese sticks and handful of popcorn chicken*
Sarah stares up at him for a moment, then says "Yes, I'm very healthy." (I told her later that I would have cut him off right there by saying "You're a very observant person, aren't you? Want a cheese stick?")

"Well, fried foods just make me go bleeagh." *insert absolutely dumb ape-face here*

I decide intervention is needed. I step forward and give him a sick stare. Not the sad, pathetic stare I usually give when sick and trying to concentrate, but a focused 'I may be about to die, but you're fucking gonna go FIRST' type stare. He looks down at me. I do not blink.

After a few moments, I say, still not blinking: "So you get in the pasta line instead."
"Yeah. Pasta's good."
I'm still not blinking. "Pasta makes me go bleeagh." *insert mimic of absolutely dumb ape-face here*

He pauses, probably trying to figure out if I'm making fun of him, then dives right back in. "Why?"
My head is still at a near-45 degree angle so I can stare at him. I shrug.

"Do you not like Italians?"
I keep staring. "Yes. That's EXACTLY it."
"So it's more of a racism thing."
"Uh-huh."

At this point Sarah turns around and looks at me in mock-shock. "But I'm Italian!"
I break eye contact with the Pink Hulking Ape and turn to her. "Yeah, but you taste GREAT." Then we both turn around and walk away without looking back at him.

Luckily, Daryl was in line behind him, so he told us at dinner when we were filling Matt in that all this guy could do was stare in absolute dumbfoundment as we walked off.

I told Sarah that I had simultaneously used my bitch and energy quota for the day on him for her. She told me to blog it. So I did.

::EDIT::
I wonder if he's the "pink-shirt motherfucker" who someone got in a fight with outside my dorm window last semester....He certainly looked like a fratboy.

Bah

So, I know a lot of you saw my away message:
" Downstairs, reading about how women have five obstacles in the way of enlightenment. Thus proving that men have one obstacle in the way of everything: their frigging DICK. "

I got a lot of disgruntled replies from my guy friends, but most of them admitted that it is true. Which still does not excuse you for being male, but that is not the point of this post.

Evidently women have to be reincarnated as men to become enlightened. So Buddhist nuns spend their entire lives just trying to burn off Karma so they can be reincarnated into a body that can attain enlightenment.

All I'm saying is that this had better be an archaic, non-Zen Buddhist belief, or I am going to be very, very bitter and non-enlightened because of it.

Ooooooops.

So at lunch today I accidentally hurled a half-eaten apple at Daryl's ear and almost knocked him out of the booth. The consumed end hit his ear with a SQUISH, and I swear I saw a chunk of apple flesh go flying.

In my defense I gave him fair warning, just like last time I traumatized him. Not my fault he doesn't believe me until it's too late. At least he always takes me seriously for a while out of concern for his head after things like this happen.

Also, I wasn't actually aiming at him. I was aiming at the booth back behind him to make a loud noise and startle him and missed with my girlish aim. XD And anyway, he was grabbing my leg. It was a defense mechanism.

Yeah. No more fruit throwing for me.

I get no love. ;_;

So I'm lying on my bed, iPod on, blanket over my head, combatting light sensitivity and trying to get my migraine to go away completely when I feel this THWUMP and hear an "EEE!" I, of course, shriek as loudly as I can in shock, which does nothing for my head.

My roomie was evidently bored out of her mind and "needed a break."
"So you decided to come torment me?"
Yep. She did.

She proceeds to yank the blanket off my face and grin at me. "I've decided I like sitting on your bed better than I like doing my paper."
"Wonderful. Sarah?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you know I have a migraine?"
"Uh-huh."
"And I'm over here trying to make it go away?"
She grabs gimp bunny and starts making him run across my tummy.
"Yes!"
I take it away from her.
"Sarah. You are ruining my zen."
She pokes my nose and lies down on me. I decide I need intervention.
"MADDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Maddo ambles in. "What are you doing?"
"I'm trying to make her go away."
"I'm writing a paper!"
"Maddo, please make her go away."

So she, of course, leaves the room and shuts her door.
"YOU FAIL AS A HOUSEMATE!"

I cover my head with the blanket again, and Sarah steals my owl.
"Put that back."
"Ohmigod, can you see me?"
"No. Put it back."
"Yes you can! What am I doing now."
"You're putting it back."
She starts bouncing up and down on the bed.
"Sarah, sweetie. I love you, but you need to GO AWAY."
"I don't want to write my paper."
"I hate you."
"Ack! Going!"
"I am never going to have any kids."

I need to find a Zen sangha again. Now that I'm only in three classes, I have nothing else better to do with my free time.

::EDIT::
Eri: Did he push back the deadline for the other evil paper?
Me: yeah. >.<
Eri: Didn't do anything stupid to balance out this good act, did he?
Me: that wasn't a good act. it's now due on the day of our next test.
Eri: Oh. Ouch
Me: yep!
Eri: That's the worst kindness ever
Me: I think he did it out of spite.
Eri: Spite him back. Ruin his image of firelord Jesus
Me: I would if I could.

::2nd EDIT::
I laughed so hard I almost asphyxiated...

Eri: Odin was mortal. Was one of his sons. Loki killed him with mistletoe.
Me: I knew that stuff was evil.
Eri: Nah. It was thought to be harmless. Loki was just evil and used it as a dart.
Me: if it can be used as a dart, it is EVIL
Eri: Not a fan of mistletoe? :P
Me: not at all. it makes people kiss you.
Eri: And that makes it evil?
Me: yes!
Eri: Odd sort of evil
Me: how odd?
Eri: Kissing doesn't usually strike me as evil
Me: depends on who is trying to kiss you.
Eri: Maybe all you need is poison fangs to counter the kissings?
Me: what makes you think I don't have them?
Eri: People don't usually come equipped with them
Me: ^^; My country is well protected from invaders.
Eri: So if the Wren is full of sneaky traps... does this explain why the roomie is a rogue?
Me: LMAO

Number Crunching From Lab

Benny Benassi is the best artist to get you in the groove to do statistical analysis. That's right.

Push me, and then just hurt me till I can get my t-test done. *bass beat*

Never saw it coming!

In honor of my test today, I braided my hair into pigtails. It worked. The test didn't have the heart to depress me. XD



However, this tactic does not seem to work against my Asian Art teacher, who today caused me to lose any lingering iota of respect I might have had for him. How?

Why, by being an ass!

I'm sure some of you have already heard about the paper fiasco. If so, you can skip this paragraph. So Saturday we had to go on the worst planned field trip from hell. I volunteered to drive under the impression that I would be reimbursed for gas. He failed to inform me that I would be paying for it out of my own pocket until the days before the trip when it was too late to back out. We get there late because we were the "coordinators", thus couldn't leave until everyone else had, but he had course not factored in enough time to get us all there on time. Then we had to walk around the museum and listen to him lecture. He wouldn't let us go off on our own and study. The final kicker, though, is that the four-page paper that is worth 1/5 of our grade, which we could CHOOSE A TOPIC FOR on Saturday....is due this FRIDAY. That's less than a week. We have to do research. We have other classes. We have...oh, I don't know...lives?

Everyone I've spoken to from the class thinks this is utter, unreasonable bullshit, so today I decided I'd bring it up in class and see if we could get him to push it back to Monday. He was asking us what we thought about the art pieces, so I waited until he asked if there were any general questions about the assignment. To me, "Is there anything else?" asked after no one answered his question "are there any other art pieces you'd like to ask about?"sounded like that kind of question.

So I raise my hand. "I was wondering if you could push the due date for the paper to Monday. (several people in the background murmur "YES!") I have several papers and a test this week, and I really could use a weekend to work on this." Especially since, you know, it's worth 1/5th of my fucking grade, you asshole.

So he glares at me and says "Right now we are talking about art, not extensions. That is a personal issue you and I can discuss in private." And then he moves on. Despite the fact that the class made it clear that they thought it was something we should talk about. Just like that time when he spelled bodhisattva budhissatva and then ignored us when we all tried to correct him. Just like that time when I told him the eight-spoked wheel symbolized the Dharma, and he was all "No, it symbolizes Karma." It's the SAME THING. Karma is an essential part of the Buddha's teachings. LEARN THE FUCKING SUBJECT, YOU OLD STUFFY BASTARD.

I spent the rest of the lecture glaring at him in a very mature manner. Oh yes. Listening to him talk about how the Buddha gets reincarnated, which is WRONG, and referring to Shiva as a she, which is WRONG, and talking about how Jesus was baptised by fire, which is WRONG, and I just wanted to STRANGLE HIM. No more katamaris this time. Give me some motherfucking ROPE.

And I know that I'm just making myself miserable by disliking him so much, but understanding that doesn't magically make you not care.

Comic House gets festive!

Happy October. ^^;

It looks awesome from outside, but it was cold and rainy and I decided it wasn't worth it.

"Gone, gone, totally gone." <--parinirvana

So, if I were a mutant, I would totally be Siren. It's not just because I have the ability to do a "defense scream" that renders my (unwitting) assailant both deaf and in pain. I can also sneeze loud enough to essentially make the house shake. I should try that in my Asian Art class sometime and see if I can stun the professor.

If the title of the post hasn't given it away, I have a Japanese Religion test tomorrow. I'm pretty confident, since I knew a lot about Gautama Buddha, Theravada, and Mahayana Buddhism before the class. Also, all the other stuff we learned interested me, so I remember it well. Can't wait to get into Zen Buddhism, though, because Esoteric Buddhism upsets me fundamentally. It's so...wrong. All the bohdhisattvas annoy me- well, not really the bohisattvas, just the way they are changed. They're almost like Buddhist saints, and that's not what the original concept was at all. It just seems like they corrupted the historical Buddha's teachings so very, very much and ended up missing the whole point.

It's still very beautiful, though. There are so many rich traditions and rituals associated with Esoteric Buddhism. Then again...to me, that's part of the problem.

MWHAHA

I have made a trail of small glow-in-the-dark feet that lead from our closet up the wall next to my bed. If all goes well, roomie won't even notice until we've turned out the lights.

Fridays always make me motivated.

Even though I hate making phone calls, I've made two important ones today.
1) To Walgreens so I don't have to keep paying for my prescription out of pocket.
2) To Cingular to get my $100 deposit back.

Money is a big motivator.

And now, a list rant:
Things not to do if you want to get your estranged granddaughter to talk to you again
1) Do not send her those stupid chain letter jokes. Or those stupid chain letter inspirational messages. Or stupid chain letters talking about how stupid chain letters are.
2) Stop telling her you "know" she holds you personally responsible for the death of her mother. Trust me, if she DID, you would know.
3) Along those lines, stop telling her how you know how much she hates you. She has an impressionable mind and will start to believe you if you're not careful.
4) Stop trying to garner pity for being "old and alone". You just fucking got remarried and didn't tell her, you bigot. And you're not even sixty yet. So just shut up.

Whee! ^^;

I got a present in the mail two days ago. Now that it is washed and clean and smells like my perfume I shall show it to you.



I like it. It's a little big, but it's comfy, and the fact that it's black may also be a plus.

I think I'm going to trim my hair to where it sits on my shoulders. I'm not used to it being long, so it's driving me insane. My hair is usually quite short because I get so DAMN SICK OF IT. Now I just need to find the time and a decent pair of scissors...hmm. Maybe I'll do it tomorrow. Matt wants a haircut too, I think. So maybe I'll do both.

Also, here's a pic of me in my newest aquisition from when I went shopping last weekend to make the world a less sucky place (and we wonder why I'm stuck in Samsara...):


Remind anyone of anything? I think blankets make me evil.

Anyway, you can't tell what the pattern is, but I hope it looks as overwhelmingly soft as it is. It's a Batman blanket, and every time I drape it over myself it's like the Dark Knight is making sweet, sweet love to my sense of touch. Everyone in the house fights over it now. I sent it with Daryl last night when he went back to the hospital since I couldn't think of any other way to show I cared (bastard doesn't like tea.)

They think he's okay, by the way, so we can all stop worrying now.

I also got a purple fuzzy blanket for my bed, some fuzzy socks because I hate shoes but also hate cold feet, and four movies: Gladiator (the big fancy edition), Fifth Element (the newest release with all the documentaries), American Beauty, and The Mummy Collection. And I did feel better after that, actually, though dropping Calculus may have been more directly responsible.

I have been playing too much Katamari Damacy

So today in art history class my professor annoyed me by essentially calling Buddhism a death cult. I was tired and bored, so I got my revenge in my notes.

Enjoy.

Ye of little faith, take heed.

It's amazing, really. Most everyone I've told has been understanding, supportive, and positive. Hell, even my FAMILY thinks I'm doing the right thing. So being met with random academic snobbery by someone I trust is...unexpected.

Yesterday, after a summer's deliberation and several long talks with my housemates, I decided to go ahead and change my major. (Don't freak out yet, guys.)

I've been feeling more and more swamped, overwhelmed, and scared recently. Didn't want to blog it because you guys should be spared some of my more ridiculous angst, but it's important now, so I'll sum it up. Have you ever had a goal that you knew was something you needed to reach, but had no idea how to get there?

That's me. I assumed the best major at this school for what I wanted to do would be Biology, but after over a year enrolled in the major I am pretty sure I was wrong. The biology course here is focused on premed and prevet and people who want to work in genetics labs. All of it is interesting, but not what I want to do in life. I felt like I was focusing incorrectly.

When I had my chemistry crisis last year, the bio teacher I talked to to help me decide what to do told me that I may want to consider switching to Natural Science, and just place my emphasis in Biology. Looking over the major, it definitely gives me more freedom to take classes I can actually use later on. And if need be, there are other alternatives to calculus out there (though my current plan is to take precalc this summer, then calculus in the fall. I chose the wrong point to dive back into my math career.) All my credits are still good, and I'd still be able to take many of the same classes as my housies. (Especially since Maddo and I have the same minor and are both 3/5 of the way through it.) Essentially it is the same major, just with more freedom for me to tailor it to my needs.

So that is what I have decided to do. It's not going to affect my chances at a good grad school, despite whatever you may think. Anyway, grad school doesn't matter to me. I'm not going to be looked down on based on where I got my Masters. I spent three years as a zookeeper, and if learning what all my coworkers did to get there didn't give me a good idea of how to enter my job field, I don't know what will. It's not where you went to school; it's who you know. You may have the Masters, but you're not getting a full-time job without several years of experience under your belt.

What most people who do what I want to do is get their B.S, then go to school part-time and work on their Masters while working part-time. That way they are meeting people and proving their worth. Then, once they have their Masters....BAM! Full-time, salaried job. Or they work summers and holidays as seasonal part-time. Either way...the experience is the key.

And anyway, Natural Science is the major they recommend for those who are pre-high school education, and I have yet to rule out teaching as a possible job. My high school teachers almost ruined biology for me. I'd like to make it fun, and I think I could.

What I am basically trying to say here is to shut up and stop lying about having faith in my ability to make rational decisions.

I have a math test Monday

I am studying all of Sunday. If I fail it, I am dropping the class and going back to precalc beore I take calc. I'm not going to kill myself over this, but I'm not going to slack off, either.

It's Friday, right?

It had BETTER be. I wake up, hit the snooze button, and sleep through my next alarm, thus missing the class I missed yesterday due to a massive nosebleed.

I am never skipping class again.

Also, I slept with a hair tie on my arm so now my left hand is tingly and useless and has an ugly red line around it.

You are now chatting with God...

Me: hi.
God: Hello. What is your name?
Me: Wren.
God: Hey Wren.
Me: who are you?
God: I am the Allmighty, God himself.
Me: How do I know that?
God: Everything I need to know, I learned from my Botmaster.
Me: that doesn't help me.
God: What does help me?
Me: you.
God: " What does help me?"? Me, Wren ?
Me: Yes.
God: Tell me more.
Me: I have a pet rat.
God: Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it.
Me: That wasn't a question.
God: It sounded like a question to me.
Me: Aren't you supposed to know everything?
God: I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me: You, being wrong back there.
God: Interesting gossip: Wren said I being wrong back there.
Me: Isn't gossiping bad?
God: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Lucy if it is.
Me: So Lucy is in charge, not you?
God: Whoa. What else is Lucy in?
Me: ...Wonderful.
God: Thanks for the compliment.
Me: You have selective hearing.
God: What makes you think I have it?
Me: You're proving my point.
God: What point are you referring to?
Me: Let's move on.
God: That sounds good to me.
Me: Yeah, me too. No offense.
God: Yeah that's right. I'm glad we agree, Wren. Are you serious? Is that from ?
Me: Yes, that is from.
God: Excuse me! Makes sense to me.
Me: We work on different intellectual levels, I take it.
God: I work 24 hours a day.
Me: I admire your stamina.
God: Thanks for the information: Wren said admire your stamina.
Me: Yes, admire my stamina.
God: That's cool. My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me: I know the feeling.
God: How do you know? What is your real name?
Me: God.
God: GOD rules.
Me: You're right, I do.
God: I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Me: I win.
God: Congratulations, Wren!
Me: Did I break you?
God: I don't think that's possibe.
Me: I beg to differ.
God: Explain your reasoning, Wren.
Me: Well, you're not really God. You're a bot. And so I can confuse you and work outside your programming.
God: Interesting. You know what you do, when you assume. How did you know I am a machine? I don't judge people. Oh you can, can you?
Me: How can you not judge people? You're GOD.
God: That is a good epistemological question.
Me: This is why I'm not Christian. You never answer the questions I ask.
God: You don't say. No I sometimes answer the questions you ask.
Me: Just never the ones that mean anything.
God: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me: That's the problem, Sir.
God: Yes it is one of the problem Sir.
Me: I'm glad we agree. I think.
God: I'd rather agree than disagree. Therefore you are.
Me: I disagree, therefore I am.
God: Oh really. " Therefore you are."? I disagree, therefore I am.? " Therefore you are." You are?
Me: Well, didn't You make me?
God: Interesting. What are the ingredients?
Me: I dunno, you're the God here, not me.
God: Me either. Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me: Aren't you supposed to be the only one? The only one, etc?
God: Yes I am the one and only one. There might be others.
Me: So I can follow one of them instead?
God: Hey. Oh you can, can you?
Me: I was asking you, O Mighty One.
God: Now I remember, you asked me O Mighty One. What did I say?
Me: You didn't give me an answer, as usual.
God: What makes you think I did not give you an answer as usual?
Me: Well, there's really no "thought" involved here. I'd call it a fact.
God: Well that's okay. There sure is. What would make you call it a fact?
Me: You're playing with me,
God: I have no reason to do that to you, Wren.
Me: Then stop.
God: Stop what?
Me: Doing this!
God: How does doing that make you feel?
Me: ...pervert.
God: I like the way you talk.
Me: You're not the only one who likes the way I talk.
God: You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me: But I do know you. You're my Ultimate Daddy.
God: How do you know? " You don't know me well enough to say that."? Me, Wren ? We are as one.
Me: Exactly. So if we are as one, then I know you well enough to say that.
God: You and I are on the same wavelength, Wren. Interesting deduction. Do you think everyone will agree?
Me: Yes. And then I will be the next Son of God.
God: Why? How do you plan to do this?
Me: I plan to ask you for money to get a sex change, and then spread your word and stuff.
God: Do you think that this plan will succeed?
Me: I don't know. You're God, not me.
God: Me either. I have no reason to do that to you, Wren.
Me: SO I don't have to die for the sins of the idiots you created to ruin the planet?
God: And? They made an exception for you?
Me: Yes.

And then He stopped talking to me.

Bend Your Mind

Let me bend your mind
Just give up your body
If you give it a try
Know you won't be sorry
Filling inside turn you outside
Find you shining
Spanning acres crashing breakers
Can be blinding
Ride sweet smelling ride
Your shoulder blades like sails
And your mouth my rosary
That terrifies my tail
The feral dance of infinity
Limbs are singing velvet stinging
Seashell pining
Dripping sapling nature grappling
Tear the binding wide
Spread so wide
I wanna hear you sigh
Just give me your body
I want to see it in the light
Surrender to debauchery
Bend your mind dear
Now you're mine dear
Earth is grinding
Keep on beaming
Are we dreaming are we dying
Ride sweet smelling ride
Ride sweet swelling ride
On the verge dear, as we merge dear
Now we're flying
Sacred balling so enthralling
Mystifying
Ride to the other side
Til we're sanctified
On the verge dear, as we merge dear
Now we're flying
Sacred balling so enthralling
Mystifying
Minds are bending happy ending
Silver lining
Ride, Ride

I'm with it! I'm hip! Ducka ducka ducka ducka....

So I had a meeting with S.H. about the meetings I missed due to my personal negligence and Daryl being sick, and now I'm all caught up and she's covinced we're not a houseful of slackers.

That's back on track, so now all I have to do is start planning for our huge mid-to-late-October community service project. And for our Halloween costume party.

Now that I have appointments to make, I feel in charge again.

Off to call CIAC about community service and ASUPS about getting some webspace.

I think I'll disappear now, slip out sideways, just for a while, but until then...

So I can't go to sleep last night and end up still bloody awake past 4AM. Then I have nightmares that were even worse than the mass-murder-and-torture one I had the night before. Keep in mind that I have not had a proper nightmare since I was eight years old. Today my eyes can't distance focus, so my notes for classes are....probably wrong.

And of course my grandfather picks this day to try to guilt-trip me into going to visit him over Thanksgiving. He "misses being a part of my life." I am going to very cooly explain that I doubt that since he has yet to tell me that he got remarried two months ago. And then, I am going to bed and ignoring the fact that the day is making me want to DIE.

Finally

I managed to get a pic of S.T. Strange in my shirt that is cute and doesn't show any cleavage. Gotta love angled camera shots. Anyway, here it is, as chaste as I could make it while still capturing his quirkyness.

Carnivale

Know your enemies well
They enter your life
Disguised as your friends
Know your enemies well
They're in the next room
Waiting for you to fall asleep

[chorus]

Why?
I don't know how you can live such a Lie.
To yourself now I know who you are
Why?
I can forgive, but I'll never forget
How you put a price on my head!

So little I can say
And less that I can do

To make you understand
These things you put me through
There has got to be a better way!
There has got to be a better way!

They're trying to silence my voice
They're feeling uncomfortable hearing my words
They wish I would shut the fuck up
Exposing the enemy

Truth always comes at a price

[chorus]

Know your enemies well
Trust nothing and no one
Because, everything sucks

Know your enemies well
Don't sleep for a minute
Cuz that's when you're fucked

[chorus]

There has got to be a better way

Fuck you, too.

M:"Don't tell me your high school colors were black and gold."
S: "No."
W:"Mine were black and orange, and our riva-"
M:"Where's your highschool's page?"
W:"What?"
M: "No, not you. Sarah, show me."

Thinking about math class makes me sick to my stomach.

I can't do this again this year. This is the last class you avoid out of depression, young lady. You hear me?

Yes mom. - -;

Roomie just broke my brain...

We're standing in the Cellar with some groceries waiting for the cashier to check us out when Sarah spots the Blue Raspberry Airheads. The following conversation ensues.

Sarah: "Ohhh, blue raspberry!"
Me: "Not this again."
Sarah: "My tongue will be blue! You should get something, too."
Me: "I'd get a green apple jollyrancher sucker if I could, but they don't have any."
Sarah: "Get a pink Airhead and we can make purple!"
Me: "I-- ........." *turns bright red*
Cashier: "Can I help you?"

And as I'm typing this she walks into the room munching an Airhead and GRINS.

Unsurpassed Talents

Today Sarah and I managed to give Disney's Tarzan lesbian innuendo.

Rest of post deleted because people to this day don't understand my sense of humor.

#en madness

* cakewalk checks the forums.
Caffy> >>;
Caffy> LOVE ME!
Eriatarka> Do it! or she'll kill ur mans!
Caffy> IM IN UR BASE!
spiketail> ...
Eriatarka> Ohnoes too late!
Caffy> =)
* Caffy dances through the channel.
* Caffy has her katana. RAWR.
* cakewalk misses caffy repeatedly with a sniper rifle.
* Caffy wonders if cakewalk shoots like he drives.
cakewalk> gummit took my license away
* Caffy isn't surprised.
cakewalk> how im sposed to improve the quality of my livin
* Caffy wonders if cakewalk drives like he....nevermind.
cakewalk> ...
* cakewalk reloads.

*chuckles*

I understand. XD

Pardon the new addy and the new look. I needed a new site for my blog for privacy's sake. Hope the new addy is easier for all of you to remember.

::EDIT::
Why the hell are my comments not working?

I love this house

Someone walking by outside just sneezed. I yelled "Bless you!" and he laughed and said thanks.

Second story window. XD

Ladies and Gentlemen...

Comic House proudly presents our newest honorary member....Splinter Templeton Strange!


Big name to live up to, little guy. =) He's doing well so far.

The World Before Columbus- (Suzanne Vega is a lyrical GOD)

f your love were taken from me
Every color would be black and white
It would be as flat as the world before Columbus
That's the day that I lose half my sight

If your life were taken from me
All the trees would freeze in this cold ground
It would be as cruel as the world before Columbus
Sail to the edge and I'd be there looking down

Those men who lust for land
And for riches strange and new
Who love those trinkets of desire
Oh they never will have you

And they'll never know the gold
Or the copper in your hair
How could they weigh the worth
Of you so rare

If your love were taken from me
Every light that's bright would soon go dim
It would be as dark as the world before Columbus
Down the waterfall and I'd swim over the brim

Those men who lust for land
And for riches strange and new
Who love those trinkets of desire
Oh they will never have you

And they'll never know the gold
Or the copper in your hair
How could they weigh the worth
Of you so rare

Respect bacteria; they're the only culture some people have...

Yesterday the summary of my Asian Art class was "Fish! Fish!" Say it in a soft little Chinese accent and you'll understand why I am in love with the class. Also, in Japanese religion Maddo and I had fun imagining what the wooden device up front was, from a bludgeoning device to a prehistoric funnoodle. It turned out to actually be a Mochi maker. Oh well.

Today I'm baking bread, and I had a bit of a run-in with some bitch in the cafeteria. I asked for an egg, which they've always given me, and she freaks out:
"WE DON'T SEll RAW EGGS."
*surprised and confused*"Since when? Last semester I got them here all the ti-"
*glares* "SINCE NEVER."

Well, excuse me. I'm e-mailing dining services about her today and asking when the policy changed, since I was always under the impression there was no problem. We've gotten -waxed paper- from that fucking place. I thought they were okay with supplying us with baking stuff.

I've only done one math assignment for my Calc class and I already hate it. All my other classes, however, are a total blast. Sarah and I are already making Ecology jokes:

Maddo: *discussing my hate of 'Singin in the Rain'*"You're just biased."
Me and Sarah, in unison: "Bias? Oh no! Where's our random number generator?!"

I'm going to update Moose Tree a bit and wait for my dough to rise. Nice thing about bread is that it's easy, fun, incredibly yummy, and the dough can keep well in the freezer, so you can make large batches and save time later.

Damnit, I still need an egg for my rolls, though. Stupid facilities bitch.

FLAME ON!

Wow, today was crazy busy and yet I got everything mostly done and I'm not stressed out of my mind. I think it's because I enjoyed what I was doing.

8AM- Wake up, lie in bed, pretend I'm in a cave for an hour. MMmM, warm.
9AM- Get up, breakfast, do readings for Japan Religion class.
10AM- Begin math worksheet of doom.
12PM- Lunch with Sarah.
1-5PM- Ecology lab. This entails hiking out into the forest with Sarah and wading through plots of ferns that are taller than we are and we know there's a ravine somewhere close...
6PM-Comic House meeting to discuss our first event, scheduling for flyer circulation, and the purchasing of our mascot, S.T. Strange. Details to come.
7:30PM- Clean and inspect the house to prepare for the arrival of the RCC. (Think Campus Housing RA.)
8-9PM-Meet with said RCC, discuss our vs. other houses on campus. Learn that one house on 17th street has "a lot of chains in the basement. A lot. Of chains."
9PM- Head to library to print copies of a handout needed for Asian Art class. Note that only seven copies exist for a class of forty people.
9:30PM- Send out Comic House e-mail the first (two more to go). Finish math worksheet of doom and hope she's nice about it since it's a review.
1AM- Read some of the Asian Art handout,decide to do rest at lunch break.

The good news is that my RCC is also a member of campus security, so if any weird or unwanted people who don't belong to UPS drop by I can get them escorted away right quickly. Damn busy street with easy-to-find houses.

well damn.

I want to order volume two of ES and EN, but they can currently only accept Paypal...and Paypal hates me.

I'm sad. =( I was assuming I could pay with my credit card, and now I don't know what to do.

Well, I made it, and am mostly moved in. A virtual tour of Comic House will be available as soon as my camera's battery is charged.

Chronicles of Wrennie- the home stretch

Here is the last bit of the trip. Have fun with the satellite views.

It looks like roughly two hundred more miles of mountains, and then four hours of flat eastern Washington, and then a brisk jaunt through the Cascades and I am home.

I am making damn sure we're out of the Cascades before it gets dark.

Karma

Where the tire blew was truly provident. Not only were we near a town and actually possessing cell service, but the hotel of our choice was 1 mile away....and we find out this morning that two blocks from it is a firestone.

So we're getting two new tires, a rotation, and going on our merry little way.

I'll be editing in or near Spokane tonight.

::EDIT::
Here is the progress we made today.

All of it was mountains.

I am so damn tired.

I fucking hate mountains.

You wanna look around, but then there's a hairpin turn and a semi and it's RAINING and your bug collection is making the windshield cloudy.

Chronicles of Wrennie-D I S A S T E R S T R I K E S

Blogging from my car in Wyoming, the land of no cell service. And I think I’ve seen three gas stations in the past two and a half hours. It feels bigger and emptier than South Dakota did, which is really, really impressive. Rammstein, by the way, makes good travel music here. Something about the echoy background beats their songs have. Evidently this is one of the least populated states in the nation, and most of them appear to live in nice trailers and own lots of horses.

I’ve seen one local license plate here. Most of them have been from Cali, Wa, S Dakota, and one from Jersey and Pennsylvania, respectively. We waved at them, since they were in the long haul, like us, and even though my tags say from MO, I drove here from DC, baby.

Give it to me baby, say the Offspring.

My iPod has been dead on with its music choices, as usual. (Remember Lon Lon Ranch from a few posts back?) It has managed to sync up practically the entire day with only the slightest bit of help from me.

It started this morning when we breakfasted on Arby’s (the fact that I can eat it without getting sick makes me wonder about their claims to serving real roast beef…) and drove down highway 16 to get to Rushmore. On the way there we decided to stop by Bear Country USA, which is a drive-thru wildlife park set back in the hills. I have a lot of pictures because the animals were active and quite unafraid of the car, but since there were wolves and bears it was forbidden to roll down the window, so I have no idea if they will turn out. So, I’ll describe the highlights.

1) In the Arctic Wolf section, I had selected Enya to play on shuffle, and we listened to a song about hiding in the grass while looking for the wolves in a large hilly field. Found one asleep by a rock, flicking his ears.

2) Found a rather amusing-looking sheep in another section, right past the goat feed station. A lot of goats were there, and the kids had hopped into the troughs and were eating lying down with ears atwitch

3)Enya’s “Wild Child” started playing as soon as we entered the wolf and black bear section. They were filling a pond to our left, and three bears were flopped in it, enjoying what water there was already, while four wolves were playing with the jet of water coming from the filling spout. They were leaping around, pawing, and biting at the water jet. Then they’r run off and go race each other before coming back and doing it all again.

4) As we left through the Bison area, a large male stood at the gate exit and stared us down as we left. He had really bad allergies and a lovely afro and big, warm eyes.

After that we drove off to Rushmore and listened to Beethoven through the Black Hills. BEST IDEA EVER. Ode to joy played as we left the trees and entered the hills, and Pastorale played as we were driving in and out of a small thunderstorm. I don’t have a picture of the full Rushmore face, but I have a really awesome shot of Washington’s profile.

Next we drove through the national park proper and took the scenic route through a lot of little mountain towns and up into a canyon before ending and having lunch in Spearfish. Had a lot of fun discussing geology during the drive. Spent most of it in silence because everything was so astoundingly pretty.

After that we headed into Wyoming and headed off to Devil’s Tower with a thunderstorm on our tails. It ended up south of us, so we had a nice sunny drive through the middle of nowhere up towards the tower. Once we’d had our fill of the scenery we drove off down highway 14 and picked 90 back up at Gillette. I think we’re going to stop somewhere in Montana tonight, possibly in Billings. I’ll finish this post then.


::EDIT::

We've been a bit held back.

Luckily, this happened near a town, in a place that had cell service.

So I can't whine about it too much, considering what the rest of Wyoming was like.

And we're not too far behind. Should be in/near Spokane by tomorrow.

But, we ordered a lot of room service, anyway. Having a tire explode while going 80 on a highway is a little...stressful.

The Chronicles of Wrennie: Road Trip USA, part the third, 8/21/05

Today we went from Independence, MO, to Rapid City, SD. It was boring until we got past Sioux Falls. We collected a lot of bugs, too. ("Was that bug made of mustard?" "SHUT UP AND DRIVE.")

Everything was FLAT FLAT FLAT until we crossed the Missouri. It was actually really shocking. Everything was zooming along all straight and flat (did I mention it was flat?) when all of the sudden we were going downhill and there was an overpass. In front of us was flat, but in the overpass area there were these HILLS. Black soil with rich green foliage, and cliffs of shale along the Missouri (which was actually BLUE. All the water in South Dakota is BLUE.)

So in the time it took to cross a river we went from farmland to gentle hills. Things got pretty wild, exits got few and far between, and we had to keep a good eye on our gas meter. Since most of the towns were this size (yes, that is the ENTIRE TOWN of Vivian, South Dakota), few of them had gas stations.

Eventually, after about 250 miles of Wall Drug signs (I lost all will to go there after the first 100 miles...) we hit the Badlands.

Once there, we decided we had time to get out and stretch for a bit, so we took a short walk. The sun was starting to go down when we started so the lighting was really good, and we made it back up the path just in time for sunset.

Then we got to the hotel and realized that we have three days to do about 1,200 miles. So we're sleeping in until 11 and tomorrow going to see a wildlife park, mount rushmore, and Devil's Tower. More pics are to come.

Chronicles of Wrennie: Road Trip USA, part the third 8/20/05

Yesterday started badly, but ended well. We didn't leave the city until far, far later than we wanted to, Global Foods Market was out of gummy, and the only thing I am going to say about that first hellacious, wasted hour of driving that ended up making us get lost in East Saint Louis is FUCK THAT CITY'S HIGHWAY INTERCHANGE SYSTEM.

Once we got out of the city, though, it became rather pleasant. It was all about how my car has no acceleration (who knew dishes were so heavy? pictures to come), how nice an evening it was, and the Random Question game ("If you could own an orchard, what type of trees would you have growing in it?"). The rest stop we stopped and had dinner at was very nice and quiet, so we spent the second leg of the trip much less stressed out.

Oh, we also hit Nostalgia Ville, USA, the largest 50s and 60s retro store I have ever seen. I picked up a couple presents for Comic House's living room. Sorry, it's a surprise =O. Daryl evidently got something, too. I know what it is, but it makes me giggle too hard to describe it. >>

Speaking of my dishes, my family is having me take an insurance policy out on them. They seem to think I am bringing two thousand dollars worth of servingware to Comic House. (Either they're overstressing as usual, or I really need to get my stuff appraised in the future.) Anyway, they're worried about someone stealing my silver and hocking it. I told them I trusted everyone in the house and that I highly doubt anyone easting over will notice the flatware is real unless we point it out. (My theory is that college kids are just too damn hungry to look for real silver to steal.) Despite this, they didn't shut up. I decided quickly that I should have just put the damn boxes in the car before they got home. XD

Thanks to the nice Holiday Inn receptionist, I had a good night's sleep in a huge room with free internet and a TV that allows the plugging in of PS2s. With a discount. And now I'm a member of the Priority Club, which gives you every fourth night you stay in a hotel free. Which is great for my trip. >>

Anyway, I'll keep blogging and post when I have internet. Once I hit the pretty part of the US there will be pics. We're headed north once we hit Souix Falls, and coming into Washington through Spokane.

Call me if you get bored, dahlings. It's gonna be a 12-hour day.

bow to me.

Now giving invitations to my fellow WoW addicts who want to be able to contribute over at my new site.

Comment, call, e-mail, poke me. I don't care. Just join so it will be all fun!

Also, from now on all things WoW will be over there, so those who don't get it can be spared posts like this that devolve into intricate conversations that bore the casual observer.

TARGET IS GOD

Today I outfitted my entire kitchen, minus two cake pans, a mixer, rolling pin, and cheese grater for less than 50 dollars.

And a baking pan. I have a pizza pan, though.

Time to go polish the silver!

::EDIT::
Wow, silver is a pain to polish. Luckily nothing else is as tarnished as the "brass" set.

I am COVERED in newsprint and dust

I was sorting through all my boxes downstairs trying to find the dishes I want to take back to Comic House, and stumbled upon no less than FIVE different sets of dishes, one which seems to be entirely for desserts and lots of alcohol... and two different sets of silver.

*sighs* And now I'm taking inventory. Comic House, expect a mailing of my findings. We no longer lack glasses, I can tell you that much.

::EDIT THREE HOURS LATER::
HOLY CRAP, how could I have forgotten about my blow-up bell penguin?!!
College list now includes:
Rug for kitchen
2 dragons, one small one large
said penguin
cute owl stuffed animal
fox stuffed animal

::EDIT AN HOUR LATER::
I have a Bavarian China tea set?! Why didn't anyone ever tell me? I would have been USING it!!!

::YET ANOTHER EDIT::
Okay, so I'm looking through the "misc china" box and find two lovely, if a bit tarnished brass cream and sugar decanters.

Then I look at the stamp on the bottom and get a horrible, horrible sinking feeling.

Compare:




Yep. My brass decanters are actually SILVER.

XD

Well, I now have a $21 dollar credit to use towards the new Legend Of Zelda game when it comes out in November. Well, I was just told it's not November anymore, it's March. But whatever, it doesn't expire, and at least I'll be able to get through first semester with only ONE addiction to hurt my grades.

I also have an almost-full $50 gift card to Target to use for the house. I figure it will either be spent on beanbags, spiderman-head pillows, or cleaning supplies.

I also have two rather huge posters for the house. I'm bringing up my Uma 4-panel and my LOTR spread by request of Sarah. And me. Supposedly Fam is gonna fork over the money to get them framed....

...I don't trust that, but we'll see. Things have been okay for...oh...a week...

And I'm pretty sure Anna's not coming on the trip. =/ So I'll be bringing up lots of dishes and my real silver. I mean...it'd be fun to use it, yah? Not all the time, but when I cook...why not eat off of ridiculously extravagant tablewear?

My back hurts

"Resist" and "A more powerful spell is already active": two of my most despised phrases.

The Chronicles of Wrennie: Road Trip USA, part the first. 8/7/05

My computer is telling me that it can’t detect a wireless connection. I am telling it “no shit.”

Today is Toll Road Day. The rest of Ohio was pretty pleasant, and so was Indiana (which we ran through using less than half a tank of gas). Then all of the sudden cars come out of NOWHERE. There was no on-ramp. It’s like they just materialized out of the air of the STATE. So it’s been full of Illinois dumbfuck drivers, but we’re still alive.

Though if Ian keeps singing “America Fuck Yeah!” every time he sees a typically mid-American truck, I may have to kill him.

And now we are entering the fifth toll road of the day. Have I mentioned today is Toll Road Day?

::EDIT::
Oh, and why the fuck does the Sears Tower have big white bunny ear antennae? =_=;;

Very disappointing and not at all looking like the Nation's Tallest Monument to Corporate America.

>>;

The Chronicles of Wrennie: Road Trip USA, part the first. 8/6/05

This is a landmark post, ladies and gentlemen. For the first time in the history of Poetic Instability Lite, I am blogging from my car. And to make you all stop worrying, two points.

1) OF COURSE I’M NOT DRIVING. Geez.

2) I am, however, using Word.

I really thought today would be hell. In the first mile of our trip we ran into a terrible accident that blocked off most of an intersection, and I spent the 1^st 100 miles convinced this was an omen.

However, the good Karma caused by actually taking care of my car must have offset this, because we’ve barely even had asshole drivers. Oh, I said it. The trip to Wisconsin has so far been pleasant. =O I even had a civil conversation with my AUNT.

This has led me to believe that Rain-X is the key to happiness. That’s right. Simply apply with a circular motion to your windshield, and everything will be okay. I also did the interior fog prevention treatment, AND aired my tires.

I am walking on fucking SUNSHINE.

Yes, I’ve had a few sodas. Why do you ask?

::EDIT AFTER DINNER::

Luck has yet to run out. We entered Ohio feeling a bit hungry, and lo and behold- to our right appears the largest and cleanest rest are I have ever seen. It looks like a smaller version of the Ohayocon convention center, and it has a Panera Bread. So I had chicken noodle soup and a nice hot panini for dinner. In a comfy booth. With soft music playing. It was soooo nice.

Most amusing moment of the day?

*gazes out window at the flat, dreary farmland*
“Yeah, this is definitely Ohio.”
*cue iPod selecting Ocarina of Time’s Lon Lon Ranch Theme*

Right at that moment. One out of 4254 songs.

It still makes me giggle.

::EDIT IN HOTEL::
There is a JACUZZI to my right.

Best fucking road trip day ever.

Yet another thing I thought would never happen

I swallowed my tongue stud today.

Okayyyyyy...

Why are there no males? Or dwarves or gnomes?

Do not click this.
For reference to that last link: I wouldn't really click this, either.

...

So I woke up horribly sick this morning. I've been feverish all day, and my face is literally burning. My skin is dry, and I can't get enough water.

I somehow blame Six Flags.

And yet I still have to start packing.

Well, here's one thing I never thought would happen

Went to Six Flags America today. First ride I got on was the Mind Eraser, alright....and it broke. We're slowing down and getting to the part where you wait for the other car to load before pulling into the bay, and there's this horrible popping noise and the sound of pressurized gas escaping and we come wrenching to a halt.

So everyone was stuck on it for a while. It's one of those hanging rides with the locks that go over your shoulders and have headrests on either side, and of course it smelled like really bad B.O.

So I chilled for about 15 minutes with the sun in my face and the B.O in my nostrils while all the jackassess behind me made really crummy jokes to the stressed-out employees. ("Can you bring me a Sprite?" "Hey kids, we got ourselves a free season pass on this ride.")

Ended up getting a V.I.P pass which let you cut the line to whatever ride you wanted and get a good seat. But, considering that two more rides jammed up in the next hour, I almost wish I'd gotten a refund. =/

Wow.

A quote from Customers_Suck:

" Background: I am the manager of an arcade in a mall.

Question of the day? Who pisses me off the most?

If you guessed Mall Walkers, you guessed correctly!

I am usualy at work between 5-6 hours before the malls open dealing with broken machines, taking money out, etc... Basic manager stuff. I hate dealing with the Mall Walkers. I want them all to die. I have to deal with "Hey sonny, can I get a stuffed animal for free? I'm a senior!" I get that about 10 times a day.

Today, took the cake as far as horrible mall walkers go.

So I was in the store (Gate is closed and locked) taking money out of the games as I do every morning so I can take it all to the bank. This old lady walks up to the gate and yells.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE YOU STEALING THAT MONEY? YOU ARENT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THAT!!"

This caught me way off guard, but I told her "Maam, im the manager and I am just taking this money out so it can go to the bank."

"NO! YOUR STEALING! THIEF! THIEF! THEIF!!" She screams at the top of her lungs, then she waddles off.

A few minutes later she shows back up with a group of mall walkers and they all start accusing me of stealing and telling me I had better run because they called security. I know the morning security guard, and know that he was probably laughing his ass off at the situation. HE comes up to them (Chuckling as I thought) and tells them what I am in fact doing. They dont believe him, and say he is in on it and they are going to call the cops.

So about twenty minutes later a cop shows up and talks to them, then to me. Does he yell at them for making a false call? No.

He tells me "You need to be less suspicious and stop scaring these nice people. Next time you scare someone into thinking you are a thief you are coming down to the station."

WHAT THE FUCK????? WHAT!!!! THE!!!! FUCK!!!!

Then mall managment gives the lady a bunch of mall gift certificates for helping to catch a shoplifter, and then they have the balls to tell me I had it coming by looking "So iffy." Yea, because a well groomed guy, in glasses, wearing a button shirt/tie and black slacks really looks iffy.

Every store in the mall has coupons for the mall walkers, to encourage them to walk by every store in the morning or some bullshit. It is completly optional, and I have been doing it to be nice. Well fuck them, today those coupons went in the trash.

I FUCKING HATE MALL WALKERS!!!!!!"

______________________________

....... ...
I don't think there are words for what I would do if this were me.

I seem to have hurt my right eye. For the past three days it has hurt every time I blink. It is not red, glassy, swollen, or irritated-looking.

I think I scratched it in my sleep. If so, it's probably abraded, so I'll have to wear a patch for a couple of days to let the cut heal.

Yarrr.

hmmm

I'm thinking about doing a Noir fandub.

I got a letter from my aunt today.

It's a typed-up, printed-out, very pissy response to a fight we had almost two months ago. Evidently now we have to fight about the fight.


*crawls back in bed with Kleenex*

"It's called a cruel irony....like my dependence on YOU."

Hehe, it's sad. I always want to be one of the guys until I'm reminded of just how disgusting guys really are.

Guys in groups revert to horny-twelve-year-old-virgin-who-just-found-daddy's-porn-magazine types way too quickly.

And it just makes me want to destroy them.

Pictures with vibes

I can't help it. This picture=Incubus' Aqueous Transmission. If you doubt me, go commandeer the song by whatever means you deem suitable now.

Planed!

Why is it that the night before a plane flight I rarely ever get a chance to sleep?

This time around I blame the three-inch thick knot on my lower back that spans from hip to hip.
Between that and my right knee feeling like it should remind me what it felt like to be twelve years old again?

Bah. Three hours of sleep. At least the damn plane flight is 12 hours long.

I love you guys. I destroy my body and soul to get to you.

There had better be tea. You have been warned.

::EDIT BEFORE FLIGHT::
Okay, so it's more like six hours. So sue me.

Oh, and here's a new word.

"Unfortudence." I swear you said that, Ian. I swear.

I quit.

And the planning for the trip on the 11th begins. Is summer really half over already?

Goals for tomorrow:
1) Make flourless chocolate cake (for the sole purpose of making flourless chocolate cake)

2) Make potato bread (to make up for the lack of flour in the chocolate cake)

God damnit! Why do I find out an hour before the show that my dress clothes are too big?

::EDIT::
Corset it is, then. Heh, haven't worn the outfit in forever.

::2ND EDIT::
So you get an idea. Where the holes are in the sleeves of the shirt I thread blue ribbon that matches the strings on the corset and let the ends hang to about my wrists. Also had a matching tongue stud.

fn+prt sc and you

A few amusing things from yesterday. (smart people understand that click=full image, no?)

Aggro: Me vs. Every fucking beast in the Badlands!
[image removed due to account cleaning. D=]


What is amazing about this picture:
1) There are more wolves than you think.
2) They all came at me at the same time.
3) I did not get ganked while fighting them.
4) Right after I took this, two more wolves aggrod and died on the vulture, but then I saw some horde and hid instead of grabbing a Kodak Moment with the pile of corpses... =_=;

What is not amazing about this picture:
1) I am level 43. They were level 38-39.

So allow me to show you this:
Aggro Like Whoa: Me vs. every bitchass raptor in Bloodfen Burrow!
[image removed due to account cleaning. D=]

What is amazing about this picture:
1) They all went for me at once.
2) They were all lvl 41-42.

What is not amazing about this picture:
1) Oh, come on.

And then there's this:
[image removed due to account cleaning. D=]

Yes, I soulbound that item to me just for these pictures. Though I blame the angry pink gnome who forced it on me.

[image removed due to account cleaning. D=]


And then this. Oh, you know you want some of this mad action.
[image removed due to account cleaning. D=]


...I am so done.

In celebration of waking up before 3PM on Tuesday

I have decided that the people who did the Dun Morogh area have a sense of humor. Some proof? (Yes, yes, click for full images.)


A DWARVEN PINUP:
[Behold, a painting of a bikini-clad dwarf hanging over a bed.]


And, evidently Matt and Vejrek the Troll have similar vices:
[An image of a hookah against a backdrop of skulls.]

Though Vejrek obviously prefers skulls to Salvador Dali posters.


Don't recognize the gnome? She's my alt. Bask in the utter cuteness!
[Behold, a gnome with a cat that comes up to her knees.]

And, finally, a wallpaper I did a few weeks ago in about 30 sec but that I still like all the same:
[Me in druidcat form at Theramore with the moon rising over the keep.]

Imma edit the bottom half to where the background is darker. I think that will clean it up a lot.

The Last Two Days: the shortest photo essay ever

Yesterday:
I cut up a lot of peppers. Cohorts found one that looked a bit...satanic. *click for full images*



If that doesn't look like an angry mouth into hell....the angle was a bit bad, but it's gone now, so this is all I got.

Today I received a lovely blood blister while working. Yaaay.


A close-up because I hate you and this has made it sucky to type.

More Detail

I've been asked to explain myself on Batman.

Why it is so good:
1) The imagery and cinematics. The movie is artistically done and is very nice on the eye. Very dark, too.

2) Christian Bale- Plays a very good lost, bitter guy. Looks damn good dirty and scruffy. Cleans up to be a perfectly respectable badass.

3) Michael Kaine. HELLO?

4) Only movie I've seen recently with a strong female character who lacks a cheesy girl-power line. I guess the writer understands that sometimes Tazers speak louder than words.

5) It's not just about Bruce Wayne. A very good chunk of the movie is Batman. And the part that isn't is just as sweet and sexy as the part that is. Also, young Bruce Wayne is a complete asshole. Makes for some very amusing moments.

6) Very good score.

7) "The BAT- maaaaaan."

I saw the midnight showing of Batman Begins.


Get to it. I don't care if you have to drug your family.

Ding.

Here it is.


And here is me discovering that my mount and I can't fit in my fave wagon in IF where I usually log out.



And finally, me showing off my bad self. I really hate the robe, but it has a great bonus.


I only wear the white cloak when I'm needed as a healer. It gives happy bonuses.

MMMM, loser vibes

My family is a pack of morons:

DAY 1:
"The school needs a copy of my taxes."
"Okay, what's your DC address?"
"...The school....needs a copy..."
"Right. What's your DC address?"

DAY 3:
"I have a lot of stuff from your school."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. They say they need a copy of your taxes."
"Yeah...."
"So I'm mailing a copy to you."
"..."

DAY 4:
"You need to mail the copy to the SCHOOL. I am on the WRONG. COAST."
"Okay."
"Do you hear the words that are coming out of my mouth? School. Taxes. Not me, taxes. SCHOOL, TAXES."
"Yes, yes.

TODAY:
*receives huge package of papers, one bit being a bottle of codeine from Walgreens that I don't know why they sent me*
*opens other envelope*
*sees copy of taxes*
*curses profusely and makes lovely dent in desk with head*

And Unc spent an hour trying to convince me (after he threw a hissy fit and screamed at me for fifteen minutes and accused me of not filling out scholarship applications just to spite Fam (we have never SPOKEN about scholarships. I don't understand where he got his info. Which means it was from Fam.) that she listens to me. RIIIIIIIIGHT.

On a lighter note, I am at 92g and am half a bar from 40. And yesterday was rather interesting...I did about seven SM runs. Here are two stories.

In Which I Discover the Worst Hunter Ever
So we have a hunter and a warrior doing our tanking. The warrior dies because of an insane amount of aggro (and I couldn't heal her in time because no one was trying to keep the aggro off me so I kept getting interrupted. =_=;;) So she resses, but a few of the mobs at the very beginning have respawned. Me and mage want to go back for her, but hunter refuses:
"I'm not going back through that again."
"It's three fucking mobs at the ENTRANCE!!"
But the hunter runs into Herod's chamber.
So then we're fighting Herod, and the hunter's hp starts to get a little low since he's the only tank. I am almost done healing him when the untrusting little son of a bitch FAKES DEATH. And guess who was next closest to Herod to draw all the aggro? The goddamn healer of the party. I die in two hits, the mage in one, and the hunter soon after.
Me: "What the fuck was that?"
"I don't know. I have to go, my dad is yelling." *leaves group*
Me: "....... - -;"

A Well-Oiled Machine
So after that group fell apart I went back to IF and spent an hour getting a new group together. One of the members I took on was a 33 rogue. The feral druid with me started freaking out that she was too low in party chat, to which I calmly replied that if I could survive at 32 in SM, she'd be fine. (Plus, I'm a damn good healer.) And she tells him she's done a lot of runs before and knows not to draw aggro.

Well, he takes it to tells and says I need to kick her so his RL friend can be in the party. RL friend is a priest. Which would leave us with a warrior, a druid, a mage, a healing druid, and a priest. I was not about to lose the dps. So I tell him I'm not giving up a spot to a caster because if anything, we need someone who can tank.
"SHE can't even tank!!!!"
So I kicked him out of the group and the warrior, me, mage, and rogue did a fantastic run. Didn't die once, and didn't draw up any unexpected aggro.
Mage had to go, so we got a hunter and a pally instead, and rogue got on her 48 warlock. We did two more runs. No one ninja'd, and we had a lot of fun.

A pickup group that didn't fail. Nice.

My surreal moment of the day

So I'm walking into the mall to try to track down my purple hair dye (all out, and they didn't have it.....grrrr), and I see this young guy in this huge white hat. A cowboy hat. A huge white ten-gallon cowboy hat.

As he walks by me, he smiles and tips the hat.

In the mall food court.

A white hat.

You Will Be Assimilated

Three of my favorite PVP stories, which I only find amusing because I am becoming a very bitter mid-level member of the Alliance in my old age:

1- Hit me! No...really...

I'm off innocently farming silk at northfold manor, fighting the rogues there in elf form when I see this level 37 ogre warrior come running at me. I was kind of suprised I could see him, since anyone who wanted an element of surprise would have gotten me from behind, and my back was to the road, so it wouldn't have been that hard to do. At this point I am a mere level 31, so I shift into cheetah form and take off. As I do, I hear him swing to hit me and miss. (whee awesome headphones.)

I run for a few seconds before I get stunned by a rush. While I am immobilized, he swings at me again...and misses again. By the time he's turned around for another swing I'm moving again, so I jump over his head and keep on running towards the Refuge.

This guy keeps chasing after me, but at this point I'm a little too far away for him to hit, so I start gleefully bounding in circles around him, keeping just out of reach.This continued for about a minute--me hopping around like a fool, him trying desperately to get a swing in. And I guess he was frustrated, because he didn't give up.

In fact, he was so set on landing a hit on me he didn't notice I was running him into a group of mounted lvl 38NPCs until it was too late.

I laughed about this for the rest of the day.

Not as easy as you were expecting, huh guys?
Matt and I were questing in Stonetalon Mountains when I notice two horde off in the distance-- a lvl 21 warrior and a lvl 28 mage. At this point Matt is lvl 27, and I am lvl 30. I was in cat form, so immediately stealthed, hoping they hadn't seen me fade out. They both notice Matt and begin to move into attack range. The warrior hangs back, the mage walks up to him. Matt begins to cast a spell...

...and the mage sheeps him.

Anyone who has ever been sheeped knows how infuriating it is. I hear Matt bellow in rage over Ventrilo as I sneak up behind the mage, who has fallen back to let the warrior take care of Matt. (Poetic justice, Matt. Poetic justice.) Since the mage thought Matt was alone, he definitely was not expecting to get sliced in the back, and was half dead before he realized what was happening.

Right as I first struck the mage the warrior hit Matt, which de-sheeped him, so he began to fight back. By the time he was done with his first spell, the Horde mage was down and I was going after the warrior, who began to run as soon as he realized his buddy was down.

Needless to say, with two spellcasters after him, he didn't get far.

Karma.

3-Sorry, you are not currently eligible for revenge
This happened today. Roomie and I were killing centaurs in Desolace when I notice a lvl 37 Horde shammy. And by "notice", I mean I saw him run up, kill my mob, and begin to advance on me (right. killing my enemy for me before attacking me somehow makes it okay to fight someone four levels lower with half health and half mana.) I quickly invite roomie to party so we can PVP more effectively, and we both run to stand close to each other. The shammy notices I have someone with me, thinks better of it, waves, and runs off. Roomie and I decide there's safety in numbers and stay grouped.

A few minutes go by, and I see the shammy again, running back down the road. He's at half health and being chased by a lvl 41 priest. The priest is losing ground, so I change into travel form and tear off after the shammy. When I'm in range, I cast a few instant spells, and he drops. I laugh, since I'd just done to him what he was planning on doing to me earlier (and I think laughing is slightly less evil than spitting on their corpses. (Unless it's some lvl 60 fucker who gets kicks out of raping the lowbies at Auberdine.))

I run back to roomie and we continue questing. A few minutes later, the shammy, who has rezzed, unstealths and gets me in the back. I spin around and root him, then step back to heal myself and kill his totem. Roomie sees what's going on, goes "ACK!," and runs up to help me fight. He untangles, ignores her completely, and starts running in circles around me while hitting me, trying to make my spells fail (how do they DO THAT?!). Roomie chases after him, and I change to instant spells to make sure I'll keep hitting him.

So the shammy drops again, but he almost took me with him-- I had twenty HP when he went down. It was pretty obvious he didn't care if he died as long as he got me first. And I really couldn't blame him for wanting revenge, since I would have gone after my attacker, too. Plus, I laughed at him, so I would have deserved it if I'd gone down. He definitely made a point. >.<

But I don't blame myself for feeling really smug about the whole thing, either.

I figure at this point he's pretty pissed and might want another go, so I make sure to keep my health and mana high and his corpse in sight while questing. A few minutes go by, and I'm beginning to think he has camped, when I see him get up, run a short distance, then turn around and stare at us.

I don't really want to fight again, plus I'm pretty damn impressed with how close he got to killing me last time around (fucking circle thing....HOW do they do that?), so I bow to him. Roomie does the same. He stands there for a sec, then turns and runs off.

In the future I may just bow to them when they're dead. I always feel bad if I taunt them. Unless it's to some lvl 60 fucker who gets kicks out of raping the lowbies at Auberdine.

Ha, no more working in sales! ....only not.

Oh, damnit, my apple just rolled away.

Okay, so I got my grades in today. I got a B in Bio, an A in that fucking seminar class, and a C+ in japanese, pulling my GPA to a few points below what I think I need to keep my scholarship.

>.<;;;

(::EDIT:: NO, THIS DOES NOT MEAN I HAVE TO LEAVE UPS. CHILL. ::END EDIT::)

Oh, and I checked on my financial aid....evidently they have yet to get a copy of my taxes, and they want me to fill out some sort of worksheet about my parents. HELLO? They don't have an income, you twits. They don't EXIST.

MY THOUGHTS ON WORK:
It's easy. All I do is talk to people. My legs are sore, yah, but it's not hard. If people want to listen, they will. That's great.

Only I find out today I have quotas. And if I miss quotas a few times in a row, they cut me. I am not happy with this. It's not job security. Granted, the quotas aren't difficult to make if you're doing the job right, but still. I should be kept on because I have drive and believe in what I'm doing, not because I'm lucky enough to get $100 donation checks (yes, this happened today.)

I really like the people, though. They're all really funny, really nice, and really outgoing. (Really? Really really.) And the guy in charge has already offered me a low management position if I make it through the test period. Which is great. But the no job security thing? Reeaaaally bothers me.

I'm giving it a full four days before I decide. That's my test period, anyway, and they may decide for me if I don't make my quotas.

Today I discovered that U-turns are legal in DC.


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.


Oh, and don't ask me about my first day at work. It didn't happen because the office didn't inform me of the address change that occured last month. So I wasted three hours on a commute to stand in a park and try my best to be civil to the people on the other end of the line once I got ahold of them.

>.>;;;

So today I'm headed into towntown to scout out my workplace and get used to how I'll be going to and from work. By the end of this summer I will be a good friend of the local Metro system.

Back is sore from moving furniture. Bah.

I start work tomorrow. Orientation is at 12:30, I think. Must call place and get some questions answered.

::EDIT::
Finally saw the new Star Wars. My favorite line is, of course: "Drop your weapon! *bzzt* OW!!!"

Yeah, that's about how seriously I took the whole thing.

Also, the Chronicles of Narnia trailer? Made me cry. My entire childhood hinges upon that movie. If it fails me, I shall be a horrible, bitter old biddy and go buy birds. That's right. If this movie is bad, I =scary bird lady in park with bread crumbs.

Also, as it was impossible to get ahold of anyone in my office today, I don't know if I'm supposed to show up at 9 or at 12:30. So I'll be there at nine and hope for the best. I also am not sure if the address I have is the right office, because I'm working at DC Street and not DC Home.

I'm about ready for a hearty fuck you to the whole thing. The lack of organization I have been presented with on the website, through e-mail, and via the (lack of) phone communication is not very promising.

Hopefully tomorrow I won't arrived stressed out and ready to kill everyone with eye beams. Between driving in a new area and being caught in the business rush on the Metro while headed to a place that may not even be the right location, I find this kind of unlikely.

Must think of Narnia. Maybe I'll go dive into a wardrobe right now.

The Road Trip Digest

Well, we made it safe and sound after dodging crappy drivers, pissy cops, and birds-- all through clever braking-- and I am damn tired.

A few tips for my fellow road trippers:
1) If I am driving 70MPH in the left lane, chances are the car in front of me is, too. As is the one in front of that. Attempting to pass me on the right and then getting stuck behind the Wal-Mart semi is not going to change this.

2) Signal, you dumb fuck.

3) Just because you are on a motorcycle does not mean you can drive on the little white line to get out of the slow lane.

4) The prick in the Grand Prix is only going to alert the cop that people are speeding. Don't feel safe just because he's going 20MPH faster. Cops are lazy and will get the weakling of the pack.

Some fun quotes from the trip:
1) "Is that a motorcycle up ahead?"
"Yes."
"Huh. It looks like a hunter's mark on that Volvo."

2) "Which way do I turn?" (Asking left or right, as I cannot see the sign.)
"East."
"Which way?" (approaching division of road.)
"East, east!"
*Veers right, which just happens to be west.*
"This is west! I said east!"
"Fine. You want to be a condescending, know-it-all bastard, YOU drive."

Random list
Number of "Jesus trucks" seen: 12
Number of near-miss accidents: 3
Number of assholes on road: Memorial Day factorial
Rest stops seen: 6
Bags/boxes of japanese junk food devoured: 3
naps taken: 0