7.30.2007

Blogathon 2K7: Behind the Scenes

It may not have looked that hard from your end. When I signed up, I really didn't think it would be that hard. Then again, I also really had no idea what to expect at all. "One post every 30 minutes? That leaves plenty of time to do other things!"

Not really.

As soon as I sat down to write my first post I realized that I would have far less time than I thought. It wasn't one post every thirty minutes, really, because it would usually take ten or fifteen minutes to write a post. More, if I had to hunt down info to post. This meant that I had roughly fifteen minutes of free time in between each post. So, if I posted, and then found another blog to leave a supportive comment? I suddenly only had five minutes before I had to start my next post.

(After it was all done, I stayed awake for another hour because my body was so used to that 15-minute schedule that it had a good freak-out when I tried to sleep.)

About halfway in, I started to hurt. I hadn't taken any of my painkillers, because I was worried they would make me tired. AT about 2AM I gave in and took one anyway. By then I had been off my Tegretol for over 24 hours, and was starting to have mood swings. When I was done and took my normal doses of meds, I could actually feel my body processing the drugs for the first time in a long time. It was pretty crazy.

(What is also crazy? How sore I am today. I was using my headset for all the posting, some of the editing, and a little commenting. If I was in that much pain by the end, what were my fellow posters feeling? I did what I could to alleviate the problem, but geez! We were doing a LOT of typing!)

Also about halfway in, I realized I didn't have enough topics in mind to write about. Forty-nine posts in one day is a lot of brainpower, and I had done no advance planning. Enter the rat macros. Luckily, after a few cop-out posts I managed to pull it all together and start posting real content again. (Except for this, but oh god it amused me so much.)

The thing that really kept me going was the other bloggers. I picked out four other blogs that I followed and commented on for most of the day, and when I had some down time I would drop in on another one and cheer them on. By the end of the day, we were getting pretty close. (It's kind of hard not to when you're all going through something that intense. It's like your first week at Uni, or band camp. Or boot camp. Stopping list now.) I spent the last few hours of the night IMing with a guy from the UK, which really helped me stay focused. Of the four people I followed, I friended two over on LJ.

I also sponsored people who a) didn't have a sponsor, or b) didn't have much money raised. I found out early in the day when I got my first pledge from a stranger that it can make or break a blogger during the 'thon. Comments are nice, because you know people are reading, but getting a pledge from a stranger makes you feel all warm and squishy because you realize that someone cares for your cause. Next year I am planning ahead and making sure I have enough money to do more than two sponsorships. (Blasted rats.) I really wanted to sponsor my AIM buddy, but $5 USD is pretty much useless once converted, and I wouldn't have been able to afford a payment that would actually have an impact on his end. (Blasted America.)

My two biggest regrets? One, that no one made me a Read poster, and two, that my e-coffee and e-tea support idea didn't catch on. I thought it was adorable. =(

The thing that I love the most about that blog is how different it is from this one, or any other blog I have done. It has a cohesive beginning and end, and reads almost like a story-- looking through it after the fact has been as fascinating for me as I hope it is for you. I've found roughly 30 errors caused through dictation, and where they occur often coincide with a time when I was particularly tired or feeling particularly terrible. You can see exactly when my brain snaps, and also when I was having a "WHAT WAS I THINKING OH GOD" moment. It's amazing! One perfect slice of day.

All in all, I had a blast. I'm going to start planning my next blog in June of next year so I can get my name out, get plenty of sponsors, and get a good solid theme going. It's a long ways off, but if any of you would be interested in blogging along, we could form a coalition and keep each other alive.

=D

I am now going to go two days without blogging. If you get bored, go read my 'thon blog or something.

7.27.2007

I am probably insane.

I've decided to participate in this year's Blogathon to raise money for First Book. I'll be posting every 30 minutes for 24 hours starting at 6AM on Saturday. Please head over, comment, provide moral support, keep me awake, et cetera! I'll be on AIM, and donations of soda or pizza are much appreciated by all you locals. Unc has agreed to sponsor me for ten dollars per post, so I have to keep it going for the entire 24 hours!

THIS IS THE LINK TO THE BLOG. If you don't understand the title now, you will at 6AM tomorrow.

::EDIT 6/29:: I am done. If you haven't, I suggest heading over and checking it out. As a day of blogging goes, that was pretty epic. A lot of the other blogs are awesome, too, so follow links and poke around!

A rattie update

Tweaker and The Brick have been giving me some problems recently. I would take them out for playtime as usual, and everything would be fine. But as soon as they would go back in their cage they would start fighting. I don't mean dominant squabbling type fighting either. This was the Rattie Boxing Championships, an all-tickets-sold-out show, with bedding flying and food bowls being knocked over kind of fight.

Pretty soon, it dawned on me that they were only fighting after they'd been put back after playtime. To me, this means that they're sick of each other. Which means that their cage is too small. They are brothers after all-- making them share the same room for one third of their rattie little lives would be enough to drive anyone insane. So, I gathered up my extra money and my Maddo and went on a pet store hop to track down a new home for the boys.

It's not as easy finding a rat cage as one might think. For some reason, the pet world has labeled ratties as "exotic" pets, and does a result, few pet stores have a wide range of rat products.most rat owners have to settle among gerbil cages, rabbit hutches, and ferret condos. Cages built specifically for rats are of course available online, but the shipping is expensive, and I didn't want to make the boys wait that long. I settled on a ferret condo, and I bought a three-story one. Since I've decided that I'm probably going to own rats for most of my life, I went ahead and bought a cage that would last. Since then, there have been no fights.

They are a little miffed that their new cage comes with a ceramic bowl that they can't tip over, and they still refuse to use their hammock, but they love every other aspect of their cage. I've been training them to come stand on the upper door when I open it, simply so I don't have to stick my entire arm down into the cage to retrieve them when it's playtime. Tweaker, after two days of training, has a perfectly figured out. The cage door opens, he bounds up from the bottom floor, stands on the door, and receives his yogie. The Brick, true to his name, doesn't quite get it. He runs around frantically on the bottom floor, staring at me sadly through the bars. If I try to lead him up to the open cage door with a yogie, he stands on his back feet on the bottom floor and stretches as much as he can instead of actually moving. Today, however, a little progress was made. Of course, this means pictures!



Here is their brand-new cage. They don't use the pink tube so much anymore, because they prefer to sleep below the first level. The empty space at the top of the cage is usually occupied by the hammock, which I'm currently using is a pattern to make several soft fleece ones. Observe:


Yes, that is Cars fleece, straight from the remnants bin at the fabric store. (The hammock is still not done, as sewing is painful.)


This is The Brick, looking very pensive at the bottom of the cage, while his brother is upstairs getting yogies.


He finally decided to come check it out after his brother had received no fewer than five treats.


The Brick in the back, while his brother comes up for another treat.


Now I just have to deal with their recent decision that my fingernails are snacks. They keep attempting to grab my fingernails and haul them away to nibble on them. It doesn't feel very pleasant. I read on my rat forum that if you "squeak" when they do things that are uncomfortable, they'll realize that they're hurting you and stop. This will probably work with Tweaker, but I have a little less faith in The Brick's powers of comprehension.

The Brick is my favorite of the two. He just. Doesn't. Get it. And that is so endearing...

7.25.2007

I finally did it.

I've managed to stay polite for months. I've bitten back every sarcastic comment, met every vacant eye, and jauntily helped them state the obvious. But tonight I snapped. I told someone that I was not, in fact, a security guard--I was in costume, and out for an evening stroll.

And they believed me. ._.

7.21.2007

The Oblivion Mods Post, Part 1

Several of you have expressed an interest in the mods I use. Since I'm bored out of my mind, I figure I'll oblige. Pardon the slow posting, but I still can't type for any amount of time at all.

Computer Specific Items I Can't Help With:
Most of the mods I use are just to prettify the environment. If you're looking for more gameplay-oriented mods, I'd check out the Oblivion wiki and head from there. Even if not, I'd head there anyway to look at their section of .ini tweaks. I set my game up to take full advantage of Dual Core Powah using this wiki, which would not have been possible through the game menus themselves. Pay special attention to the grass height mod-- it's an easy way to fix framerate issues in the world without sacrificing too much pretty. Alternately, if you're looking for more pretty, you can tweak the trees. Finally, there's an option to enable screenshots (only if anti-aliasing is off, otherwise use fraps), and an option to disable all the splash screens at the beginning of the game.

What I use:
Please keep in mind one thing. The mods I am currently using are taxing to my computer, which is brand new. I am also using HDR lighting plus anti-aliasing, which I set up in my graphics card's options for Oblivion-- it won't let you do that in-game. Where possible, I am going to link to similar mods that will work for a graphics card with less memory, but please read all the text on the pretty download sites before replacing textures!

Before you begin:
Download the Oblivion Mod Manager. You'll need this to play around with getting your mods in the right order to create a stable game. It also auto-fixes your archiveinvalidation file. It's a little intimidating to use, at first, but the Oblivion Wiki is very helpful with telling you about the right settings and such. Two hints with mod arrangement: larger, more comprehensive mods (such as a game leveling tweak) should load near the top of the list. If you have several mods that alter the same effect, the one that loads last will be used by the game.

Environmental Mods:

This is where the bulk of my mods and texture changes lie. First, we have the ones that change all the pretty details.
1) Qarl's Texture Pack III- replaces textures for walls, grass, rocks, and just about everything else with huge new ones that take advantage of parallaxing. This file is about 3gigs in size, and is not recommended for graphics cards with under 500 megabytes of memory. Luckily, there is also a reduced version if you want most of the pretty but can't run the full-size.
2) Improved Doors, Plants, and Food- Pay attention to the install order! Doors and Flora first, then Trees and Flora, then Trees and Flora 2. He also made a food mod that I use, and I've been thinking about nabbing his better sign mod, as well.
3) Better Grass Without Tiling- Gets rid of the nasty tiling seen in distant grass.

Next we have the mods that alter the distances and make them look a lot clearer.
1) Noise Reducer- Gets rid of the weird pixely thing Bethesda decided to use for distances in patch 1.2. It makes it a lot sharper.
2) Landscape LOD 1- Increases the texture file sizes for the distant landscapes of inner Tamriel.
3) Landscape LOD 2- Does the same for the border regions. I use both, but if you've installed Qarl's and are having framerate issues, you may not want to install these at all. I'd choose two among Qarl's, Improved Trees and Flora, and these if you're having problems, otherwise you may experience horrible hanging in forested areas. (I feel the hit, but it's tolerable. A little jerk as the forest loads, and that's about it.)

Then we have the ones that just focus on making everything else as pretty as possible.
1) Natural Environments- Comes with a lot more than you want to use. The weather system is buggy, the habitat system is bulky, and most people find the water fix to be far too clear. Just use the Natural Vegetation part. That's the award winner.
2) Phinix's Waterfix- Not as clear as the one in Natural Environments, but not as muddy as the one in the "vanilla" game. I happen to like it quite a bit. The clarity diminishes the further down you go.
3) Rainbows in Tamriel - There is absolutely no purpose to this mod except to go "SQUEE!" and take screenshots.
4) Darker Nights- Don't leave home without a torch or night-eye spell, or you will quickly get lost and run into a tree. Pay attention to the .ini tweak. I love it for the realism, and for how it combines with the city mods I've listed below. While you're at it, nab Darker Dungeons, grab a torch and get to killing.

Finally, we have what makes the cities better.
1) Cities Alive at Night- Gives cities a glow from the outside, so it looks like there are actually people behind those walls. Pay attention to the .ini tweak.
2) Illumination Within package- For this you need both Illumination Within and Illumination Within Optimized. Install them in that exact order, and use the .esp(s) of your choice from optimized or you'll see a performance hit. It's worth it for the pretty pretty lights in the windows. After you install this, seek out a cathedral and wait until night.


Up next-- Sound, Characters, and a couple extra mods I picked up to ice the cake.

7.20.2007

Finally.

So I went to yet another doctor's appointment this morning with my regular doctor. I went in for a referral, but he actually listened to me and told me one wasn't necessary because it was so clear what I have. (Screw you, neurologist.)

He has diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. He's started me on a low-dose antidepressant to combat the nerve pain (seizure meds for my depression, depression meds for my pain...), and I am supposed to see him again in two weeks.

It's a chronic condition, yes, but at least I know what the hell is wrong.

7.19.2007

The Second Oblivion Screenshots Post (EXTENDED)

Here's a shot of my actual character, plus a shot of Chorrol post-window-illumination mod. And, rainbows!

Caleigh

No, that is not her armor. I just feel weird running around and talking to people in ninja gear.


For those of you who keep asking why I'm not doing any of the Assassin's Guild quests, here is your answer. LOOK AT THAT FACE. She'll raid your basement and reunite you with your husband, but she's not a killer. (It makes me too damn guilty. Perhaps I'll try it with Ishtar.)

Cities at Night

See how the building on the left is lit up, but the one on the right is not? That's because there is no-one IN the building on the right! How cool is that! Let me tell you, this one tiny change has made the cities much more realistic.

Rainbows

7.18.2007

The Oblivion Screenshots Post

Don't hate me because it's beautiful. (Don't hate the player, hate the game oh god it's 4AM why am I typing.)

Last night I made a test character to check all the mods I installed (wouldn't want my actual character's save game to be corrupted by a bad mod!). She left the sewers, stole a fast horse, and took off on a three-day joyride. So sit back and enjoy your tour, courtesy of Ishtar the Nominally Evil Dark Elf Assassin!

Click for large on the pictures. And, probably, step away from this page and make a sandwich, or something. These image files are enormous. And, just so we're clear on this, they are NOT resized, recolored, or altered in any way. Direct screencaps, folks.

Trees and Interface

I've done a lot of interface tweaking so that if I don't need to look at it, I don't see it. The result is very unobtrusive and makes sneaking and fighting a lot easier.

Meet your lovely tour guide


Is it just me, or does that horse seem distinctly unhappy?

Sunlit canopy

My goal was to make the game so pretty all I would want to do is gallop around on a stolen horse and stare. Well, it worked. o.o

Old Bridge

Please to be looking at the stone detail.

Sunset




Nighttime


Nights and dungeons are now dark, dark, dark! Have to have a torch or light spell to see very far, but makes dungeon crawling and sneaking so much fun. Also makes the stars really pop.

Weather

Now with rain that gets you wet! You can't tell from the screenshot, but little rivulets of water are trickling down her robe-- it's not just the damp sheen. After the storm there's also a chance of rainbows, but this rain stopped too early for that effect to happen. I'm sure I'll nab a screenie of it eventually.

NPCs

My NPCs are all so pretty now. None of the weird mottled faces or any of that rot.


And that's it so far. More screenshot posts of cities to come while I test out some more mods I've installed. Just a couple more to go!


Quotes from Work

7:00 AM
Bossman Prime: "Who told the Dish Fairy to take a shit in our sink?!"

7:55 AM
Me: "Scooby*, get up. I have to send myself an e-mail I was working on."
*Scooby obliges*
Bosslady: "What's that about e-mail?"
Me: "I'm e-mailing myself home so I don't have to walk."
Bosslady: "I thought Bossman Prime was taking you?"
Me: "I, uh... I am e-mailing myself to him first to remind him."
Bosslady: "Oh, so you and he are E-MAILING now, huh? What else are you doing together? Are you two-"
Me: "No! NO! That is beyond creepy!"
*Bossman Prime is in his cubicle, desperately trying not to catch anyone's attention/get sued for harassment/age any more than he already has*
Bosslady: "That's going to be the new office catchphrase by this time next week."
Clock: *shift change now pls*
Bosslady: "Bossman Prime, Wren is ready for you."
Me: ._.
Bossman Prime: *can no longer resist the call of his inner smartass* "So, want to ride home?"
Me: O.O

I died a little.

*I've dubbed my idiotic patrol partner Scooby.

7.15.2007

I should not be given phones

"UPS Security, this is Wren."
"Uh, hi...I was trying to reach a member of my family; who are you?"
I'm sorry for the confusion, but I've recently undergone a rather extensive lifestyle change...
"Sir, you've reached us because all the phones are on forward. It's the weekend."
"So what am I calling?"
"A university."
"There must have been some sort of technological error, because I dialed a family member. Have a good day."

Yes, the technological error of you pushing the wrong fucking numbers into your phone.

7.14.2007

Here she is!

Sorry this post took so long; I got a little sidetracked by Oblivion.

Here is a shot of Estella's guts, for those of you who don't really grasp how large this case is. o.o
The hair in the picture belongs to Matt J. I have promised him dinner out because of all his help on this.




And there is Estella assembled, sprawled across my enormous desk. Note the height of the case. It really does double as a barstool.

And here is how I skinned it: (Made slightly less enormous than my desktop for sanity's sake)



I'm planning an Oblivion screenshots post so you all can see what this computer does to graphics.

7.10.2007

"I'm like Estella-- I like to reel it in and then spit it out. I'm frustrated by your apathy!"

Though I don't think apathy will ever be the problem in her case.

Yes, boys and girls, it's official. My desktop is complete. And, now that it's too late for you people to whine about what I'm not buying, I can tell you what I got, from guts to garnish. (Seriously. Who NEEDS a quad core? XD)

Speakers: Klipsch Promedia 2.1 (only my speakers have a cloth cover. God, those look ugly. I know why they did it, but jeez.)
Keyboard: Eclipse II Illuminated Keyboard. I bought it for the purple, but have been using the blue because it matches my mouse.
Mouse: Razer Copperhead You must click simply so you can giggle at the site. XD
Monitor: Dell 2007WFP (One of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.)

Case: CoolerMaster Stacker It's a full-size tower that moonlights as a barstool. It was also the only thing I could find that didn't have eight billion LEDs or edgy skulls and claw marks or wavy edges or fuck-else. It has about three thousand fans and a filter on the side vent, which is just fine to me.
Motherboard: ASUS M2N32-SLI Gotten for a ridiculously good deal. Also, it has built-in wireless. (>>)
Processor: AMD Athlon 64 X2 I wanted a processor that was high-end middle in performance and cost, and this one pretty much fit the bill. (And if any of you say one word about Intel I am using Estella to SET YOU ON FIRE.)
Graphics Card
: nVidia GeForce 8800 Pretty much guaranteed to run every game I want to play at max settings.
Hard Drive: 400gig (Seagate) More than I will ever use. D=
Memory: 2 gigs (Corsair) I will probably use this. XP*

Pictures and screenshots to come tonight after the building party. *squee*

I hate Mondays

Thanks to all of you who called/texted/commented good luck for me today. It was much appreciated.

Not that it did much good. The neurologist concluded after one month of testing that I have carpal tunnel. Carpal tunnel. I'm sorry, but after a month of treatment, carpal tunnel should be getting better. And after a month of testing, I should have been given a diagnosis that actually reflects all my symptoms.

At one point he ran my hand along my inner arm and asked if it hurt.
"Yes, it does, but that's not anything new."
"Hypersensitivity in that area is consistent with carpal tunnel."
"No, see, if you did that anywhere on me it would hurt."
"But in the inner arm it's a sign of carpal tunnel."
"..."

So what about when it's everywhere, asshole?

He is also refusing to work with my physical therapists. They've asked him twice for my test results so they can treat me, and he has ignored their faxes both times. When I asked him about it, he said "they're...a little more involved than they should be."

Or, maybe you're an ABSOLUTE FUCKING IDIOT.

7.07.2007

I miss Manstork.

My new patrol partner is...lacking. Worst of all, he is lazy. Our last set of shifts, he spent ten of twelve hours in the office. Any time I was at the office, he tried to put me in as dispatcher so he could spent more time in a desk chair.

This set of shifts I told Dispatcher to send any admits his way, and gave the above as my reason. My boss overheard, and later gave Patrolman a lecture about not patrolling. Patrolman comes in later and asks if I got a stern talking-to, as well. I answer truthfully and tell him no.

Does he realize this is probably an issue and spend the rest of the shift doing his job well? No. Does he go to the back and spend the rest of his shift reading a book? Yes. ._.

Today I walk into the office, go to the back, get all my stuff put away and get geared up. Come back to the front fifteen minutes later, and he has not started any paperwork. I tell him he should have been doing that instead of reading a book, grab the inventory, and start working. Fifteen minutes later, I am done with inventory. And he has not even started the building check sheet!

When I express my exasperation, he asks me if I had wanted him to do it. I reply that yes, I did, unless I missed the memo about it being Read-A-Book-While-Wren-Does-All-The-Paperwork Day. Then I spend the next fifteen minutes correcting his paperwork for errors.

When I sign up for building locks, I notice that he has taken all the times we will have a dispatcher for, and left all the buildings that will need looking after while I am supposed to be dispatching. Which means I'd have to leave and have him dispatch more while I went and did them. I guarantee the sneaky little bastard did it on purpose.

So I'm unlocking all those buildings early. -.-

I have come to a conclusion-- I am going to make his work life a living hell until he either quits or shapes the fuck up. It may be more work for me, but that is more tolerable than having to deal with his idiotic bullshit for forty hours a week this entire summer.

In which Wren describes bruises and boxer-clad Mormons



The odd work events I mention in passing can be found here.

7.06.2007

Ugh.

I go in on Monday to speak to the neurologist again and see if they know what is wrong with me yet. This is the first time I can remember that I haven't wanted to go to the doctor's alone. Then again, this is the first time I've been so scared.

When I was hospitalized in high school, I wasn't scared. Yes, half my face had swollen ridiculously and I couldn't open my mouth wide enough to take a bite out of a sandwich, but I wasn't scared because everything still worked. Everything doesn't still work now. I can't keep a grip on things, I twitch uncontrollably (which has made sleeping a real joy, let me tell you), my arms are constantly going numb, and almost every time someone touches me I find a new nerve center that is in pain. I can't lift things or twist lids open. And, despite three months of physical therapy, things aren't improving. In fact, I feel myself getting worse.

By now my physical therapist is almost positive there's something wrong with my spine, which makes the entire deal even more terrifying. Minor things don't happen to spines. You can't get carpal tunnel of the fucking spine (absence of carpal areas notwithstanding).

I've been worried for a while. It was tolerable until a few days ago, when the twitching got so bad it started keeping me up at night. While I was helping Maddo and Trevor move into their new apartment, there were times it was so bad that I couldn't hold things. Now every time I twitch I end up thinking about all the horrible possible causes, and that just compounds with my frustration and I end up bursting into tears.

I hope on Monday he gives me some sort of news that makes me look back on this entry and feel foolish. That would make me really happy. Hell, a this point the phrase "pinched nerve" would come as a relief.

7.02.2007

more rat stories

I let the boys out for playtime again today, and quickly regretted it. Last time they were out, Tweaker discovered my clean laundry basket and instantly fell in love. While I was rat proofing my room, I assumed that the laundry wouldn't be a problem because the basket was six times the length of the rat

I was wrong.

Today, they turned it into the game. The Brick saw Tweaker climb the basket once and instantly decided that was a good idea. One of them would distract me, and the other would run across the room at breakneck speed and leap into the laundry. There was no climbing up the mesh sides this time, just all out leaping. I would walk over, take them out of my laundry, and deposit them on the floor. Lather, rinse, repeat. Each time I would dig them out, it would take them less time to get back in again again. I don't know what was so appealing about it. Maybe it smelled like mommy, or maybe they just loved how squishy everything was. Or, maybe they were doing it just so I would dig them out. I don't know.

Regardless, they now have a ladder made out of my laundry basket hanging in their cage. When the hammock is done, I am hoping they will use it to get in and out.